The Bible indicates that each of us plays an important role in raising godly children. While it is absolutely the job and priority of parents, every Christ-Follower is called to make disciples of Jesus. This means if you follow Jesus, you are to help in raising godly children. Whether you are an aunt, teacher, or neighbor, if there are children in your life, you can use this information to help in raising godly children.
If you think your kids are generally respectful and responsible godly children, you may recognize that you did some things right and others wrong. Ultimately, you just do the best you can to follow what the Bible tells you to do to make disciples of your children. However, your children are who they are ALL because of the grace of God! There are no guarantees, but this post will address TWO biblical principles that are crucial in raising godly children (Part 2 will address two more).
1. GODLY IDENTITY in Raising Children
Who are you? Or, better phrased, WHOSE are you? Do you see yourself as first and foremost a child of God. Or as a Mother? How about a wife? Or a friend? Are you working for approval and recognition from someone?
Raising Godly Children starts with first looking inward:
- Think about why you want well-behaved, godly children, rooted in the truth of the Gospel:
- So you can look good to others or feel good about yourself?
- For your children to have an easier life or make your own life easier?
- So God will be proud of you?
- Because God has called you to make disciples?
So often, who you are in Jesus becomes background noise. If you are not rooted in the truth of who our Creator says you are, then you are in grave danger of being easily swayed by what the WORLD says you are not who you ACTUALLY ARE.
“Oh look at her kids - SO well-behaved!” (PRIDEFULLY BEAMING) or
“Ugh! Here come her boys!” (SHAMEFULLY SLUMPING)
In Christ, you are holy, beloved, blameless, and justified no matter how your kids behave!
If you allow your CHILDREN’s behavior to dictate WHO you are, you are going to be tossed to and fro all day long! It’s our Father God who gets to say who you are! He Made you. He Loves you. In Christ, you are REDEEMED! This is the truth of who you are. So, remind yourself of who you are in Jesus. Remind each other of who you are in Jesus so that you can stand firm and raise up your children in the teaching and discipline of the Lord! Don’t let this become background noise. YOU need to rest in this to be effective in helping your CHILDREN rest in this!
2. GODLY RESPONSIBILITY in Raising Children
What is your responsibility as parents, then? What do you think makes a successful mom? Is it having respectful, hard-working children? Or raising your kids to love Jesus and serve others? Did you know that our “success” as parents is NOT based on how well the children behave? Or on their excellent grades. Or how well they perform in their sport? No, your “success” as a parent is based on YOUR faithfulness to what God has called YOU to do!
“You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your might. And these words that I command you today shall be on your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise.” Deuteronomy 6:5-7
God is sovereign. This means means there are NO limits to His rule over the world and everything in it. He is never helpless, never frustrated, never at a loss. You may have been brought up in a home that didn’t follow Jesus, and yet here you are. God got ahold of you, you repented and turned to Him. Or, maybe you were brought up in a home that truly loved the Lord but ended up turning away.
Your responsibility is to be faithful to what God has called you to even when it doesn’t make sense. Even when it seems like it’s not working. Even when our next-door neighbor who is not a Christ-follower has extremely obedient children who get straight A’s! Your success is not based on how good or bad your children act. Your success as a parent is based on following God‘s word. God has given PARENTS the duty of raising our children in the nurture and admonition of the Lord. You don’t get to delegate that duty to others. Although grandparents, aunts, teachers, friends, and neighbors can and should assist and walk alongside you, it is not THEIR ultimate responsibility– it’s yours!
You must involve yourselves in your children’s lives enough to ensure that no other influence takes precedence over YOU! You can’t blame culture, social media, television, peers, or teachers since YOU are the one who allowed any of those others to have more input into your children’s lives than you!
Having this knowledge is pointless unless it leads to obedience. WISDOM is knowing the right thing to do and then DOING THAT!
- Are you showing your children with your CHOICES in media (movies, TV, computer, phone sites where we spend your time) that you love GOD or the WORLD? Your kids are watching you!
- Are you showing your children with your ACTIONS toward others that you love them and care about their needs or really only care about what others can do for you? (Saying nice things to their face, then going home and talking about them) Your kids are listening to you!
- Are you showing your children that your WALK actually matches your TALK or do you only “talk the talk” but not walk that talk? Your kids are going to act like you.
In Raising Godly Children - Part 2, you are going to learn about two more principles: Discipline and Needs. Email “JOIN” to get on our mailing list: [email protected] and be notified (on Monday’s only) about the latest articles, the newest Monday’s Mom, and ways to help you connect better with the children in your life!
Kate Fraiser is a Parent Coach with Connect Point Moms helping you create stronger relational connections with the children in your life. This starts with being aware of your own stuff so you can BE PRESENT with your children in the moment you’re in, and then knowing and using the best ways to communicate with them. For quick and helpful parenting videos, find her on Instagram, YouTube, TikTok, or Facebook.